Forsakened Hopelessness
by Therapy Ai
Summary: Naraku has murdered all obstacles except one: Katsuro, Sesshoumaru's eldest brother. Only, Naraku doesn't want to kill Katsuro; he wants to be killed by Katsuro. He's realized that he's a heartless murderer but Katsuro loves him and wants to help. NaraOC


Katsuro was sprawled across the ground of a forest whose trees were heaving and groaning from the force of gental but harsh wind. He, too, was heaving, however the wind was not the cause of this. He rather loved the feeling of a soft breeze, in fact, but at that moment he didn't have the time to stop and enjoy that feeling.

He was too busy bothering with other feelings.

Above him was green-- dark green, barely visible green. It was night. Against him-- the ground, which was muddy and giving into his weight from the recent rain. Again, against him, was the solid and soggy trunk of a tree. Katsuro could sense that there were insects inside that tree, scuttling around in a flurry of panic from vibration waves he must have been exerting on it.

To get down to the center of things, those vibration waves were being created because Katsuro was not alone. At the end of his leg was a man, a familar man to many people, however they saw this man in so many different forms, one single opinion could never fully describe all of his personalities.

There was the wounded, and revengeful soul of the lord that lost his men to the demon Naraku, and then there was the figure in a baboon pelt that gave hints and proposed alliances. There was the resented and bitter personality of Naraku, the demon who could do no good, that had no purpose other than to utterly destroy.

However, the man at his feet had a personality that only Katsuro imagined he had seen. A vulnerable Naraku, one that knew he was guilty of crime and had commited so much brutality that he could not be forgiven. This Naraku was the one at his feet, grasping his ankles in a white-knuckled clutch.

Naraku's hands were not perfect-- there was much blood on them, much rape and much murder. Katsuro knew this, and Naraku knew that Katsuro knew. However this is what made Naraku clutch so willingly and anxiously onto Katsuro's ankles:

Katsuro knew, but he still stayed and still listened. He did not look at him in resent or hatred. He looked at him with eyes that tried to understand him, even if they couldn't.

The claws of Naraku's fingers embedded themselves in his ankles, and Katsuro flinched, but didn't get mad. His blood trickled slowly down and mingled with the mud.

"I can't go on any longer..."

Naraku was hunched over. He was on his knees and elbows, hunched before Katsuro, who was lying on the ground, against a tree. The usually cool and collected, scheming eyes of Naraku, were filled with tears that couldn't be shed any longer and wide with regret and torture.

"I need a release from this. I need the jewel to fix what I've done!"

His desperate voice made Katsuro wish that Inuyasha could hear him now. He couldn't.

"S-Sesshoumaru... and Inuyasha! What if..." Katsuro stared knowingly into Naraku's eyes that were crazy with self inflicted harm. "What if I kill you too?! What if I-- I won't be able to...!"

Naraku was silent as Katsuro pulled himself up from his leaning posture and leaned towards him. Their foreheads touched. Eyes of massacre and guilt stared into the eyes of selflessness and understanding. Katsuro's equally dirty hands placed themselves solidly on top of Naraku's and one by one, he gently grabbed each of Naraku's clawing fingers and soothed it into an unharming state.

"Why can't you...?" Naraku's anger at himself was stomped away by the gentle acceptance that Katsuro never failed to show him. "Why can't you hate me?! They were your brothers-- they were your brothers! I... I tried so hard and...! And I've still failed!"

The lone brother smiled a sad smile and wrapped his arms around Naraku's back in a soft but solid hold. He pulled Naraku to him and carefully leaned back against the tree once more. "If I hated you, who would be left in this world to love you?"

Naraku was silent, calm. His response was his quietly healing heart and tense body that began to relax. He couldn't deny Katsuro from speaking the truth, and couldn't keep himself from realizing the truth, but at the same time he couldn't help but feel that love was not what he should be feeling after all the lives he had destroyed.

"Listen to me Naraku."

Naraku's soaked and limp body stirred from it's unmoving state against Katsuro. A face full of pain slowly lifted itself to look at Katsuro's, and Katusro gently nudged away the heavy locks of hair blocking Naraku's eyes with his nuzzling nose. He placed his dry lips against the center of Naraku's forehead in a representation of his feelings and didn't close his eyes.

He watched Naraku, and saw what he'd been looking for-- a small light of hope in the red eyes that everyone had painted as bloody and murderous.

"My mother was killed by Sesshoumaru. My father was killed by a rival. My only siblings left, Inuyasha and Sesshoumaru, were killed by you. You murdered my only remaining family."

Panic beat throughout Naraku's chest and he felt his will beginning to collapse. "I, that's why--!" He was silenced again, this time by a more forceful kiss to his cheek. He fell silent in nervous and frantic anticipation-- this was the moment he was waiting for all this time, the moment where Katsuro condemed him as a guilty soul who deserved to be killed.

He closed his eyes and felt Katsuro do the same, his lovers long and rough eyelashes brushing against his cheek as they closed. "If I didn't know how much torture you're already in, I would have killed you before you even got to Inuyasha or Sesshoumaru. If I could have killed you, I would have already. But I haven't, have I?"

Naraku opened his eyes and slowly swallowed-- there was that knot of tension and something else stuck in his throat again, making it hard for him to think straight and giving him a headache. "Naraku. I can't kill you, so please don't ask again. It only makes me realize how much pain your in... And that makes me in pain. I know you don't like hurting others, so please..."

Katsuro opened his eyes and grasped Naraku by the shoulders in a stronghold. It was a grasp of pleading and desperation.

"I can't leave you alone to suffer, whether it's in the world of the living or the dead. I can't just leave you behind-- I love you! I mean it, I love you! I love you!"

Naraku stare was absorbed with searching Katsuro's expression for any sign of doubt in what he was saying, any sign that told him he still had a way of killing himself.

"Well, do you see it? Can you tell that I'm not lieing about this, master of tricks? I'm being completely honest, and I always have been."

Naraku slowly began to form words.

"I. . don't... understand." His expression was a confused one, and rightly so. He couldn't comprehend why he had such a devoted follower, a truly devoted lover, after all he'd done. "You say you love me... but I don't understand. . . how? H-how...?" The tightly drawn lips that were in a frown grit in unbearable sadness and Naraku looked down in shame at the expression he was bearing.

"How can you love someone as disgusting as me? Why can't--"

"Naraku." His shame-ridden face was lifted up by a hand and met with a kind smile.

"If you see yourself as disgusting, then I must be just as disgusting."

". . ." Naraku had no response he could conjure into words.

"You're beautiful."

Katsuro looked on, slightly amused at the bewildered pout that had managed to form on Naraku's lips. "Oh, come on now. You're pouting, you know that?" He smiled truly this time and pulled Naraku against him once more, one arm surronding his torso, and one hand caressing the top of Naraku's head. The embraced body did something he couldn't resist doing any longer and slowly began to make his arms move.

All breathing stilled as the arms that had been dead weight twitched into the air and moved closer. One returned the embrace and landed between Katsuro's back and the still soggy tree; the other landed on his chest with a hand to his neck. The fingers were blood stained and the claws were tempted to act. Naraku looked into Katsuro's eyes with a plea and when he recieved no answer to his plea, he acted the only way he knew.

The quick twitch of his hand and he had grasped Katsuro tight around the throat and pulled him closer. Their lips met in a rush and Katsuro barely knew what was happening until he felt his heart jump in realization. Naraku had kissed him, freely and openly, and passionately. Katsuro's eyes had opened when he realized he'd closed them from the force of the tug, and met eyes that mirrored his love. He eagerly returned the kiss, feeling the inevitable happen-- Naraku began to shake with need, just as he did too.

The hands Katsuro used to hold Naraku tightly to himself began to caress Naraku, and overwhelmed the both of them. Katsuro came over slightly lightheaded, his entire body shaking and his nerves on end. Naraku was yearning for more and more, and the one free hand he did have didn't waste time in trying to satisfy his lover. It went to Katsuro's only piece of clothing, his pants, and began taking them off.

Soon, they were on the ground, as was everything else the two owned. Sweat, seed, blood and tears all scattered the land around them, as well as themselves and their clothes. Katsuro's gasping voice filled with loving endearment and Naraku's intense words of passion and desperation filled the surronding forest, until quite suddenly, all was quiet.

Katsuro realized then, what had happened.

Blood slowly rolled down, until it mingled with the wet ground. Katsuro felt a cold sweat come on, but even still slowly moved his hands up to place themselves over top the claws that were embedded in his neck.

He wrapped his fingers around one of Naraku's, and calmly pulled a claw from his neck. As he did so, he watched Naraku's sadness return and did his best to shake his head.

"No, don't you cry. I told you I understand." Katsuro removed another claw, but felt his hands shaking just like Naraku's were. "You didn't do this intentionally, did you? It's just all you know to do..." The third was removed. Naraku was sobbing then, but Katsuro insisted. "No, I don't want to see you like that..." The fourth was gone, but the wound was still too deep.

By the time the fifth was removed, it was clear the wound was fatal.

"Come now.. come here, Naraku." Naraku dimly sludged himself forward, closer to Katsuro. "I don't want to see you like this, not before I..." Naraku looked into Katsuro's eyes and saw the same understanding that Katsuro never failed to show. "I want--" There was a moment where breath was lacking, when it shouldn't have been lacking. Both of their faces paled further-- both for the same reason:

Katsuro was dieing.

"I love you." This was whimpered instead by Naraku, who was clutching against Katsuro with his entire body in a plea. "I don't want you to go! Please, I'm sorry, I...! I...!" Naraku was silenced by a small hushing noise.

"I love you, Naraku... Don't worry, I... I'll make sure...you're not alone."

Lips met once again, as blood mingled with the ground as was expected. Katsuro experianced the happiest moments of his life, Naraku's return of love, and then did what Naraku had so wanted him to do, for the sake of being merciful. The insects inside the tree were disturbed by the rustling movement disturbing their home for only a couple moments longer before all was still.

Naraku and Sesshoumaru lay in eachothers arms, and had truly experianced love that took their breath away.


End file.
